Summer Of ... Booties?

Well I suppose it's a start, anyway.

Iris, one of my co-workers, was blessed with grandson #2 last Thursday. So instead of casting on for my first pair of socks for the Summer Of Socks, I decided to knit booties. Booties are fun! And fast! And don't use much yarn! And so ridiculously adorable it makes your ovaries cramp. However, you'll notice that there is no back picture of the booties. Gang, my finishing skills are the suck. Someone needs a LOT of practice with the finishing. Someone may even need to invest in a book.

The Victor Update

I'm sure you've all been wondering what Victor has been up to. Well I am pleased to report that Victor has begun working with a trainer and he's coming along very well. Sunday we tacked him up with a Western saddle. Now bear in mind that Victor is accustomed to a lightweight jockey saddle, not a 30 pound Western one. I was quite nervous to see how he would react. He obviously knew something was going on but he just stood quietly the entire time.

The trainer then lunged him in the round pen and he didn't buck, kick or try in any way to get the saddle off his back. He listens well and she only had to tell him to do something once and he'd do it.

Yesterday she worked on his ground manners while I was at work and then today we did more of the lunging with the saddle on. Hopefully in about a week she'll be able to get on his back without any mishaps. It's obvious to both of us that ol' Victor's a pretty smart boy and definitely shows some potential. Now if I could only get home before 9:00 one night I'd be able to do a bit of knitting. Horses. Much more work than hamsters.

Season Of The Wisp

Six months until Christmas, six months until Christmas! Yes, it's time to start that Christmas knitting and here's the perfect pattern for all your gift giving needs.

Wisp! Yes, I know I talked about this yesterday but I'm sick today and I don't got much. Unless you want to hear about that and trust me, you don't. Let's just say that if your grapefruit juice tastes funny, you probably shouldn't try to convince yourself that it'll get better tasting the further down in the bottle you get. Yeah. Anyway, despite my illness I've managed to do the first two repeats of Wisp and lemme tell ya, it's dead easy. Nine rows of YO, K2tog, six rows of garter stitch. And every five rows you make little holes to weave ribbon through. That's it. Could it be any simpler? So if you have non-knitting friends that like scarves, you're all set. As opposed to giving this to knitting friends who would look at it and say this is just a buncha yarn overs.

Even better, over at Fearless Fibers Etsy store you can buy enough yarn to do one of these for $9.00. $9.00! Where else can you get a lovely Christmas gift for $9.00? Certainly nowhere in California. So there you have it, feel free to thank me on December 24th.

Blue Monday

Mail Call!

More wonderful yarn from Deb at Fearless Fibers. The yarn on the right is a Superwash merino fingering weight in the colorway "Serendipity." It's slated for the Summer Of Socks which starts on Thursday, right Cookie? On the left is 410 yards of merino lace weight in the colorway "Feeling Blue." I have a hard time knitting with lace weight, a lot of it feels so flimsy to me and I end up making a horrible mess with it. But this yarn of Deb's seems to have a bit more "substance." I'm going to use it to make Wisp from the latest issue of Knitty. Actually I've already cast on for it because I need to have it finished it two weeks. So I'll be all ready to start ...

Mystery Stole 3! Have you signed up yet? Awww, c'mon, you know you want to! Haven't you seen Melanie's other designs, Leda's Dream and Scheherazade? Those were Mystery Stoles 1 and 2! Beautiful, beautiful lace. I've ordered MY yarn, now go order yours!

The Wendy's across the street from my apartment is having a big 99 cent promotion ...

However, there seems to be a slight problem with the promotion flag ...

In other strange news, someone has stolen the refrigerator from my place of employment. It was last seen Thursday. If you should come across a refrigerator filled with old Stuft Pizza boxes and half empty bottles of ketchup, could you let me know? Thanks.

I See Toes

Well technically, it's only one toe. Singular and all. But still! It's a toe knitted sideways! I'm excited.

If this sock actually fits it may become my favorite sock pattern. If you don't count all the stuff I didn't know before (but which I know now) this is the easiest sock I've ever knit. No fiddlin' with DPN's, no picking up stitches, just back and forth, back and forth in stockinette with the occasional increase or decrease. Easy peasy.

Here's a really good reason to go to the mailbox more than once a week. PRESENTS! Yay, prezzies for me. This is all from my former secret pal who is now one of my most specialest friends, Valerie. She's trying to pass this loot off as stuff she meant to mail me for my birthday in February but I'm not buyin' it. Of course I'm not returning it either.

From the left we have the longest Brittany needles in existence in a size US 6. So I don't have to resort to using circs when I wanna make something extra long. This makes me incredibly happy. Next is a beautiful bag with a very long handle so that some day, if I ever get coordinated enough, I'll be able to walk and knit at the same time. Please don't hold your breath waiting for this to happen. The picture does not do it justice in the least.

Next is a way cool Etch-A-Sketch pen which will keep me entertained while commuting. I've discovered that stop and go traffic just doesn't stop long enough to really knit so this should do the trick nicely. And finely, yarn from Valerie's trip to Australia. It's 100% wool and reminds me of a tiger. I'm thinking mitts. Definitely mitts. Thank you so much, Val! As always, your timing was perfect. *Mwaaaaaaaaaah*.

Today's Question ...

Is "How many bales of grass hay can you fit into the back seat of a Nissan Altima? Anyone? Bueller?"

The answer is - ONE. I took yesterday and today off because there's not much goin' on at the House of Torture. Or maybe I just work faster than everyone else. Ha. Anyway, I seem to have picked the two hottest days of 2007 to take off. We're talking 102 temperatures. I realize it gets hotter in other places, like say, Africa, but have pity on the poor Canadian girl. Regardless, horses must be fed. Which meant a trip to the feed store yesterday.

I needed to get three bales. But if your car is only capable of carrying one, what does that mean? It means THREE trips to the feed store. Let me tell you, the only thing better than loading and unloading hay is doing it when it's hotter than Hades outside.

After that was done I decided to keep the "fun momentum" going and gave Victor his first bath. Well I'm sure he's been bathed before but not by me. Victor didn't seem to mind the water at all. Not surprising given the temperature. But he did not care for his color enhancing tropical smelling shampoo. And neither did I since it stained my hands a bright pink. Let's just say Victor didn't have a very "thorough" bath yesterday and move on to knitting.

No, I am not knitting an obscene bathing suit for a man. This is a Sidewinder. Yes, I finally got gauge. With a 3/8 sportweight of all things. Before I started knitting this sock, I thought I was pretty knitting savvy. But you know what? And please pardon the language, but really ... I know shit. I didn't know how to do short row shaping, mitered decreases or how to make a raised bar increase. However, thanks to Nona's fantastic pattern and my copy of this book things are moving along. Would you like to see my mitered decreases? They're not very good, but they'll do.

OK, enough pornographic knitting, let's move on to cats.

Deedee is hot. Very hot. She's spent the last two days in the bathroom. Why she doesn't sit in front of one of the eight million fans around here, I don't know.

Andy is hot too. Unfortunately the bottom shelf in the fridge, his usual place of refuge in the heat, is stuffed full of Diet Coke, bottled water and Hansen's Sugar-Free Grapefruit soda. Sorry, Andy.

A Yarn Eating Dragon!

Do dragons eat yarn? It sure looks like it ...

Here's Isabella about to demolish a ball of Artyarns Merino, in the appropriately named colorway "106". What the heck? Can't people be a bit more creative in their yarn naming? Anyway, this is the newest yarn to enter Chez Insanity and will of course be used for a Rebuilding Greensburg square. Good thing I'm whittling away at that stash. Not.

Back for a return visit to the blog, is "The Grey Thing." Which is also known to some people as the One-Stitch Baby Sweater from the Lion Brand website. This is the world's easiest baby sweater. Hello, garter stitch, knit in one piece? Just right for a beginning knitter such as myself. I don't know why I'm knitting this sweater, I just am. Maybe simply because I CAN. However, I am proud to say this is a stash reduction project. When this sweater is done I will be down a whole two balls of Plymouth Encore. Go me. And probably a little bit of some other yarn because this is about the blandest sweater I've ever seen. Maybe I'll do some single crochet blah dee blah around the edges. Won't THAT be exciting?

And for those of you more interested in the equine aspect of my life, here's the Weekly Victor Report.

Victor is in the doghouse (horse house?) this week. Incident One - Managed to unlock his back gate on Tuesday night and spent the entire night roaming the ranch, helping himself to all the alfalfa he could eat, socializing with the other horses. Incident Two - Unlocked the gate on the covered round pen Thursday night, thereby not only freeing himself, but also Rebel, who he was having a play date with. Incident Three - While I was talking to my friend Pam yesterday, Victor reached down and removed Pam's cell phone holder which was clipped to her pocket, and of course contained her cell phone. Have you ever tried to pry a cell phone holder from a horse's mouth? Yeah, don't even try to tell me he needed to make a call.

HORSE FOR SALE - inquire within.

I Has Mitten?

Yes, yes, I does!!!

A mitten! I've never knit a mitten before but it was certainly fun. And educational. Now I know how to knit a thumb in case I lose either of mine. I'm knitting mittens because Rabbitch told me to. Actually she didn't tell me too, she asked me to consider knitting mittens. Being as how she's so polite and all. Well, why not? It's a nice change from socks but not what you'd call a drastic change. We wouldn't want that.

Anyway, I used Lion Brand's Magic Stripes yarn. Did you know that that yarn is sport weight? Lordy, I just read that on the Lion Brand website, I thought it was fingering weight. You know really, it's hard to understand how I ever manage to have a successful knitting project. While I doubt I'd ever use Magic Stripes for socks I think it makes great mitten yarn. The pattern is the "No Swatch/No Gauge" mitten pattern.

Speaking of gauge, and quite frankly I'd rather not, I *still* have not managed to attain the required gauge for Nona's Sidewinders. Even after discovering that I'd been trying to get gauge for a US 2 by using a US 1. Heh. However, I have discovered that gauge swatches make lovely blankets for mice. So all is not lost.

Buddha says, "The key to enlightenment is to buy more yarn."

This is from ThankEwe's Etsy shop. 220 yards of superwash wool in the colorway "Sweet Pea." Please note that this yarn does not contain any of that vile yellow color my rude camera captured. It's actually pale green. I'm thinking another pair of Magic 28 socks from this. Just to be different. Ha.

Let's Go Sideways

It's a swatch.

Really.

I know, I almost fell out of my chair too. And I was the one knitting it. I'm knitting a swatch because Nona told me to. She says I can't make her socks unless I knit my swatch first. It's a darn good thing I listened to Nona. Because my swatch is an entire half inch short! Over 30 stitches! Whoa, that was close. You have no idea what I'm talking about, do you?

I'm talking about Nona's Sidewinder Socks! I'm gonna knit a pair of socks sideways! How cool is that?!? And Nona is gonna show me how. Because she's friggin' smart, especially when it comes to knitting. Nona knows knittin'. I mean, we're talkin' about someone who swatches every day. EVERY. DAY. Just for the fun of it.

You can make Sidewinders too, if ya want. It's not like it's a private club or sumthin'. Something new! It's an adventure! I have exclamation mark-itis! Frankly it's about time I did something different. Because I don't know about you, but this blog is puttin' me to sleep.

Well, except for the Victor stuff. I still like the Victor stuff. But the knitting? Six thousand pairs of tiny socks and a truck load of squares? ZzzZzzZzzZzzZzz. Of course, some of you may feel inclined to point out that writing a post about a swatch isn't exactly Earth shattering either but hey, I gotta start somewhere.

Yo, FO

Well two anyway. You know, it's hard to take an artistic photograph when a) it's dark outside and b) it's almost bedtime and your little brain has gone all mushy like. Well maybe not for some people but that's my excuse and I'm sticking to it. Which is why we have ...

Hat On A Cat

Awww, isn't that cute, little Wilma's having a bath and her tongue's sticking out. Actually if you knew Wilma, you'd know the real reason why her tongue is sticking out. As in "FO, baby and get this bloody hat off me." Wilma, not such a friendly cat. So here we have another hat for Dulaan, it's the Seaman's Cap (teehee, I said "seaman"). And yes, it is supposed to have that much ribbing. Knit in some obscure yarn I picked up in Canada, Galway Heather. NOT Plymouth's Galway Heather. Like anyone really cares, duh. Knit on my bendy size 6 DPN's.

Thank goodness I have 8 million stuffed animals to use as props. Here's Rosy, hangin' out on the latest square for Rebuilding Greensburg. Knit using Regia Color, double stranded. When I first saw this yarn in the store I fell in love with it. Until I started knitting with it and realized it had stripes of both BROWN and BLUE. We all know what that means. Say it with me now, "Brown plus blue equals EWWWW." But it makes a perfectly servicable square.

Random Victorness

I have come to accept the obvious. No one really comes here to see my stunning FO's any more. Or to hear my million and one helpful knitting hints. No. No. And no. Everyone comes here wanting pictures of Victor The Wonder Horse. And because we aim to please, I present to you, "Victor On A Sunday."

Look everyone! I've got a butt now!

And my feet are as big as dinner plates!

Mom says I have a kind eye. Whatever THAT means.

Ok that's enough now, I'm having a nap.

FO's tomorrow. Whether you like it or not!