A Fish Tale

April 11th - Set up tiny 2 1/2 gallon fish tank, add 2 goldfish knowing that tank is way too small for one goldfish let alone two.

April 16th - Perform first cleansing of tank, marvel at the amount of crap siphoned out.

April 22nd - Grow concerned over the fact that goldies are gasping at the surface of the tank and perform second cleansing of tank.

April 27th - Goldies are once again suffering breathing distress and decide to repopulate the tank. Return goldies to pet store and exchange for two dwarf gouramis which pet store owner assures me will be fine in such a small tank. Float gouramis in their bag in the tank so the water inside the bag and the water in the tank become equal in temperature. Read all about dwarf gouramis on the innernets and how they are timid, non-aggressive fish.

Release gouramis into tank and watch as they attempt to kill each other.

April 28th - Purchase 3 guppies in an attempt to divert the gouramis attention away from commiting piscine homicide. Gouramis team up and try to kill guppies. All three guppies go into hiding behind the filter. Convince myself that everyone just needs a little time to settle in.

April 29th - Guppies still behind filter, gouramis swimming peacefully around tank.

April 30th - Return gouramis to pet store and inform owner that he sold me extremely territorial fish. Return to work to find three little faces peeking out from behind filter.